First of all let me say if this blog post upsets anybody I am sorry as it's not my intention to do so, but I need to get this off my chest and my personal blog seemed like an ideal place to do it especially since it's about my blog.
This all started last year during my 42nd birthday. I had a rather large party weekend, there were just over 30 or so people here. On Saturday evening things got a bit crazy and I got upset. The next day all was well and I had a fantastic Sunday and overall an amazing weekend.
Well come Monday when I went to blog about Saturday I mentioned that I was upset and that several of my friends were acting "out of character" and I didn't like that.
I was not prepared for the backlash that blog post would caused. The majority of my friends were great and said "sorry, wish you would have told us at the time", but there were few that weren't happy but one in particular who was extremely vocal at how upset they were and how they almost considered ending our friendship over it. This truly upset me but also angered me as I felt that I did nothing wrong. I didn't mention anyone by name in the blog (which they were actually upset about) and I was just blogging about what happen on my birthday weekend.
Anyways words were said, emails were sent and I figured everything was behind us with this incident. Well recently I was talking so some friends and come to find out that this "blog post incident" is still being discussed amongst my friends. They worry that they will say or do something to upset me and next thing they know it's in my blog.
This hurt my feelings. I have over 2800 blog posts. I have been blogging full time since 2007 and I have never bad mouthed a friend in my blog or said anything negative about any of my friends. My blog is normally about geeky things. Things I watch, things I podcast about, things I do in my daily geeky life and occasionally I'll get on my soapbox once in a long while and talk about religion or being gay or how depressed I am. But I make a conscious effort to not talk about friends & family personal lives. I have a ton of very personal conversations with family and friends.. I don't go blogging about it the next day... never have and never will.
To know that my friends think I'm going to blog about something they say or do makes me feel like these guys don't know me at all. I blog one time about four people who upset me during my birthday party weekend and I will forever be labeled as someone they need to worry about how they act or say things around... that's just crazy and hurtful.
I write this blog first of all for me as my memory is pretty bad and I love going back and reading all the cool things I have done. Secondly it's for my family and friends to keep up on my life. I don't get to talk to as many of them as I would like and this is a great way for them to keep up on my life. Thirdly it's for the general public, being a podcaster I do have a few listeners/fans and this is a great way to keep in contact with them and let them know what's going on.
I really don't know what to do about the situation. I'm not going to stop blogging or change how I blog. But it bothers me every time I blog I now think "I hope so and so doesn't gets upset over this".. it stupid.
Thanks for letting me vent my frustration and actually taking the time to read it. :)
Sorry to hear that Kenny, I remember reading the post in question and I don't think there was anything wrong with it, you mentioned you were upset but you didn't name anyone or attack or put anyone down. If they still have issues with it I think it has more to do with issues they have with themselves then anything to do with you. I can't ever remember reading anything really negative (sometimes outset, disappoint or depressed but I think that is different) on your blog & I can't really see you posting anything like that especially not where it would concern a friend. You are one of the nicest, friendlyiest people I know & I'd hate to see you beat yourself up over someone else's issues
ReplyDeleteI love to read your blogs. It's fun to read about stuff you have done or are doing, and about how life is going for you. You've been remarkably discreet about things you talk about with family and friends; it's yet another sign of your integrity, and that integrity is one of the many reasons that I am proud to call you my friend. Keep blogging, since often you do things I probably won't have a chance to do or experience, and I can live vicariously through you,and even occasionally join you in your adventures! Blessings my sweet friend! xoxo JL
ReplyDeleteI think you missed the point. It's not that you blogged about it, it's that you blogged about it rather than talking to your friends directly. Instead they found out through a very public way that they hurt you which is not only upsetting but humiliating and unfair. Plus talking about someone wihtout naming them only mad people more confused. Heck people not at the party who read your blog were calling people who were to "get the gossip" and spreading rumors making it worse. Blog by all means, it's something you love, but know that if you don't at least talk to your friends about it FIRST it iwll upset some people. I mean think about it this way: it upset you that people were talking about it with each other rather than you right? How is that different from you posting abotu it online rather than talking to your friends about it?
ReplyDeleteThat being said I hadn't though about this in ages but I guess it does make sense some people would still be worried by it. We're all geeks and being or feeling at all like we were embarassed affects us more ya know?
I don't know who wrote this (but I have my guess) I actually did talk to several of the friends in question before I blogged about it.
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