Sunday, January 22, 2012

A Turning Point

Well yesterday while talking to a friend of mine on Facebook about all the things that are not going the way I would like for them to be going I had a kind of panic/anxiety attack and actually had to get up from my computer and go outside for some fresh air, it was kind of scary. Today when I woke up I asked myself why did I allow myself to get that bad. Yes my life isn't going as planned and there have been a few hurdles to jump over in recent months and I still have quite a few things to work out still but mopey, sad, miserable Kenny is not fun Kenny and I'm tried of feeling that way. So starting today I decided that I will do my best to stop feeling this way. I know I can't just turn these feelings off but I can work on how I deal with them.

Starting Monday I'm going to began my workouts again. I'm determined to lose all this excess weight I've put on over the past ten years.  I love working out once I get started so that shouldn't be a problem.. what I see as my major problem is changing what I eat. My entire life has been poor diets and fast foods. I don't plan to go cold turkey (meaning stop eating everything I love) I will just eat less of it and hopefully in time get it down to just once a week if that.

It's time to take control of my life again. If that means career changes or relocation then that's what will happen. I'm going on my fourth month of being unemployed and funds are extremely low, I don't want to lose my house so I have to do something about it. If that means getting a regular job or taking on a roommate then that's what I will do. I spend 5 to 6 days here at the house completely alone... again that is something I can change. I need to plan more outing with friends or maybe volunteer again. I use to do that many years ago and very much enjoyed it.

I am not happy with where my life is right now, but you know what, I am the only one that can change that.. so I'm going to do just that. I may have set backs and fall back into that "funky" mood but having a goal and motivation I don't think I will sink as much as I did the past few months. Life is a challenge and it will always be that way. Who knows what the future holds but like I said in my previous blogs you never know when you're last breath will be so live each moment to the fullest. Time to take my advice and live my life!!

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