Monday, July 7, 2014

I Hate My Voice...

This came up in a Twitter conversation and it got me thinking on how far I'm come on this topic. From my early teens and into my twenties I had a hard time listening to my recorded voice. My voice is higher then the average male and I use to get made fun of all the time in grade school, which made me become less vocal and known as the "quiet" one. When I was a teen and would answer the phone I would always get. "How you doing today madam" or "Good evening miss.. is the man of the house available". It use to drive me crazy and I'm sure it lead to some of my insecurity's.

In collage I took a "child literary" course and for our final we had pick three children books with a common theme and present them in front of the entire class. Now I have a huge fear of public speaking and as I mentioned, not liking my voice played into that. But I sucked it up and presented my three books like I was talking to a group of five year olds. When I was done fellow students would critique my performance and the biggest positive/complement was the tone of my voice. That it was perfect for talking to children. That I have a very sweet and gentle voice, one that would appeal to kids. This was the first time I had heard anything positive about my voice and it felt great.

Jump ahead to 2005 and the birth of podcasts. One of the first ones that I ever listen to was called Treks in Sci Fi. Rico Dostie was the host and he was charming and funny and I was hooked from the first beta episode. I started sending in audio comments that he would play on his show. It was strange hearing myself on his podcasts but also very exciting. To know that listeners of his podcasts were hearing me and my thoughts on whatever topic he was talking about was amazing.

Slowly but surely over the years I grew to be comfortable my voice. I also can say that it had deepen a bit over time. In 2007 several members of the Treks in Sci Fi forums started doing a RPG Star Trek game and in 2008 Jen and I started the Treks in Sci Fi RPG podcast, it would be a supplement to the regular Treks in Sci Fi podcast. So now I was hearing my voice on a monthly bases and the more I listen to more I got use to it and not really care what I sounded like.

Now in 2014 I can say that I am content with my voice. Would I like it to be a bit deeper.. sure but I no longer cringe when I hear myself on a podcast or doing an interview. My voice is part of me, it makes me the podcaster that I am and I am happy with that... I've come along way!!!

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